real space.

I’m having a bad day today. You know those days? Nothing is actually wrong, but your attitude and emotions are just a bit off. There are just some days where all you want to do is cry. And you usually find ways to do so. Maybe that’s just a girl thing. Men don’t cry, right men?

I attended a funeral today for a beautiful woman I unfortunately never had the chance to really get to know personally, but she lived a wonderful, faithful, blessed life and in her 89 years, she knew what was most important to her: God, family & truly living life to the fullest. She did it right.  And to see the couple hundred people that showed up today to celebrate her life, that’s just a testament on how right she got it. There were no regrets.

If I’m being honest with myself, on a daily basis, I’m not sure I could say I’m living life to the fullest. I’m not sure I could say that I am truly joyful and grateful and thankful in life. This I know, so sometimes I purposely go looking for inspiration. I found that in Nick Vujicic. I recently came to know of him from church this past Sunday and since then, I haven’t been able to stop thinking of his story. My heart sinks because I have this aching feeling that if I was in his position, I don’t think I’d be so motivational. I don’t think I’d be living life to the fullest. I have no evidence to show otherwise because with all the blessings and gifts God has given me each day, I still find so much fault in everything… I’m ashamed.

When I come to the end of my life, I will want to know three things: Am I right with God? Am I right with family? Did I truly live my life to the fullest? If I died tomorrow, I’m not sure I could say yes to the last question. Could you? Could we answer yes to all three? I know if I’m living life to the fullest the way I know it to mean, I wouldn’t have to even ask those first two questions… They would be automatic.

Nick chose at an early age that nothing was going to stop him from living his life to the fullest. He’s different, yes. But he’s a child of God and so beloved by God. He knows this. So he’s choosing to be thankful for the gifts God has already given him and joyfully accepting them. What an inspiration that truly is. What a gift it is for me to see people like Nick and so many around the world or even right in our own families to know that you know what, things could always be worse. I will always have a thorn in my side. But life, as hard as it may be, still has gifts and blessings and if we just look for them, accept them, embrace them, we could truly have joy. We could truly live life to the fullest. We could truly have peace.

I don’t know about you, but that’s what I so painfully want. A joyful, peaceful heart. And to know that at the end of my life, whenever that day may come, I took all that God lovingly gave me and truly invested it right back into life, living it gracefully and yes, to the fullest, with no regrets.

I want to reach those pearly white gates and have Jesus say the most wonderful words I will ever hear,

Well done, good and faithful servant.